I think people are afraid of permanence. People get cold
feet before weddings because they’re afraid of being with one person permanently.
They’re afraid of getting piercings and tattoos because they’re permanent.
They’re afraid of having kids because they’re going to become a permanent
fixture in their lives. To be honest with you, I’m terrified of permanence.
I think people are afraid of permanence. People get cold
feet before weddings because they’re afraid of being with one person permanently.
They’re afraid of getting piercings and tattoos because they’re permanent.
They’re afraid of having kids because they’re going to become a permanent
fixture in their lives. To be honest with you, I’m terrified of permanence. I
can’t think of a single career that I’d be happy to do for the rest of my life,
I can’t think of a single place I want to settle down, I can’t think of being
with one person forever. It all just seems too ... permanent. But on the other
hand, maybe I’m just afraid because I haven’t found the one career, the one
place, the one person that I’d want to settle down with forever. Maybe I’m just
waiting for a calling, something that brings me such immense joy when I think
of it that I can’t imagine not doing it. Something that I’m so passionate about
that doing it forever doesn’t seem like long enough.
But then there also becomes the issue of dependence. The
more permanent something is in your life, the more dependent you are on them.
They become your defining points, they make up your personality, they become a
part of you. For a while, I avoided dependence like the plague. I thought it
was a sign of weakness, a sign of not being self-sufficient. But I know now
that is usually not the case.
There’s no problem with being dependent on something or
someone, everyone is. Maybe you’re dependent on your parents for their support
and guidance. Maybe you’re dependent on school for giving you something to work
towards, a goal. Maybe you’re dependent on your friends to get you out of a
slump. All of that is completely fine. The only problem is when the thing
you’re dependent on is toxic. When you’re dependent on drugs, or a bad habit,
or an abusive parent. If your dependency takes more than it gives, that’s when
you know something’s wrong. But then again, getting out of something like that
is easier said than done. Regardless, something has to change.
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